Apostrophical

The most maligned punctation mark? Hands down: it’s the apostrophe.

It shows up where it’s not wanted and is never there when you need it.

We’re back at the car wash, where today I photographed BOTH sides of the sign on the same day. I just had to prove to myself that they DID get an apostrophe with their set of letters, and quite a nice one at that. But rather than use their apostrophe (I wonder if they have two?) on the correct side, in either the word “Dad’s” or “Father’s”, they instead went with the less obvious “bug’s”, which would have been just fine as an unobtrusive plural.

I have yet to crack open “The Eyre Affair,” which supposedly offers a solution to the mystery of chronic misplaced apostrophes, but I hope to dive into it soon. In the meantime, I have coined my own word to explain this phenomenon: “apostrophical.” Used in context, to describe a document replete with misplaced apostrophes: “That PowerPoint presentation was downright apostrophical.” I hope it catches on soon.

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